Women especially have a tendency to put others before themselves. We have been brainwashed into believing that our worth depends on how much we cater to the needs of others. When we do choose to give to ourselves, we often have to negotiate with the guilt that goes along with that choice.

To assist with self-care, use your tendency to put friends first as a guide to how you should be treating yourself.

Decide that you are as valuable as a cherished friend and treat yourself accordingly. Whatever you would give to them, also give to yourself. You can begin with kind words rather than the criticism to which you regularly subject yourself. Would you speak to a cherished friend that way? Of course not, so don’t do it to yourself either. And would you expect so much of a cherished friend that they end up feeling exhausted and drained? No, you wouldn’t. So why do you put so many expectations on yourself that you end up feeling that way?

Decide to treat yourself with worth. When unsure, simply ask: How would I treat a cherished friend right now?


This article is an excerpt and adaptation from Seven Freedom Elements, published by Morgan James Publishing (New York), released 6th Feb 2018, and available for pre-order. Click here to learn more about the book and get your copy.

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